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LATEST POSTS
Mass Casualties Will Never Motivate Change When The Politicians Do Not Value Our Lives
Here we are again. Tuesday’s mass shooting at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, TX marked the 213th instance of gun violence in the United States this year. This occurred days after the brutal murder of ten innocent civilians at Tops market in Buffalo, NY. It feels…
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Make The Decision To End The Cycle
Sometimes I contemplate how further along womankind would be if we didn’t place everyone else on a pedestal before ourselves like men do. Men prioritize and pedastalize themselves. They would never give up their hopes and dreams to appease others. They go out and get what they want and everything else in their lives must… Continue reading Make The Decision To End The Cycle
The Price of Our Empathy
I was twenty-five when my vision of the world changed. It wasn’t the first time, but it was the most crucial shift of my life. I shed my naivete and spread my wings. The clouds parted in revelation. Not of the crystal pure sparkling sky I imagined, but of beauty overrun by murky squalls of… Continue reading The Price of Our Empathy
Eclipse Season Affirmations
Let it go, Let it happen. Keep it moving. Keep your focus on the purpose, on the passion. Step toward change. Step into your power. It’s time for more evolution. It’s time for another metamorphosis. Own this lunar eclipse season. Own this taurus scorpio energy. For two years, release expectations and evolve. For two years,… Continue reading Eclipse Season Affirmations
Fake News
Talking head but no leg to stand on. It doesn’t matter because the conspiracy fits their agenda. Their paste-face idol proclaims it to be truth and it’s enough evidence for them. Radicalization unregulated in the name of free speech and constitutional rights. Yet they all cock their brows and crinkle their noses as they demand… Continue reading Fake News
New York, New York
It’s been two yearssince I’ve gazed upon yourmiraculous metropolis aura.A pandemic-a lifetime-between us. I often wonderare you different?A silly question becauseof course you are.of course-I hope that you’re differentas inhappier,shinier,brighter. Sometimes I ignore the factthat I know the opposite is true. I imagine youdingeydarkand deep as ever. The last time we were together,it was I… Continue reading New York, New York
Love Patterns
In my youth I knew nothing of the tenderness the passion and the burning love. I knew only of the awkward, the obligatory and the butterflies in my heart that seemed to justify anything and everything as long as the boy wanted me. These were the butterflies they spoke of in the rom-coms, the young… Continue reading Love Patterns
Why Did She Stay? — Because We Are A Society of Victim-Blamers
Just because it is a part of our culture does not mean you can dodge responsibility for your contribution to it. I recently published a piece detailing how to effectively help a friend who is being abused. The issues of sexual, domestic, and intimate partner violence are highly nuanced and complex, so I recognize that there was… Continue reading Why Did She Stay? — Because We Are A Society of Victim-Blamers
I Used To Be Anti-Choice
By now, we’re all aware of the Politico leak about the court’s intent to overturn Roe v. Wade. To most of us, it didn’t come as a surprise, but that doesn’t mean we’re not in complete and utter panic. The people we’ve elected into power are somehow bringing their own religious beliefs into the law, and it is… Continue reading I Used To Be Anti-Choice
An Open Letter To The Narcissist’s Supply
Love is not isolation. Love is not hidden. You deserve warmth and acceptance and love out loud between two equals- two teammates. The narcissist is incapable of offering you what you deserve. But he makes you believe he’s given you the whole world and lassoed the moon and sacrificed everything and breathed air into your… Continue reading An Open Letter To The Narcissist’s Supply
I Can’t Stop Perceiving Myself Through The Male Gaze
Step one is to be aware of it. Step two — who knows? Don’t ask me why, but I recently began binge-watching the VH1 nostalgia-driven docuseries, “I Love The….” Of course, I gravitated more toward the episodes around the 90s and 2000s, but the series initially debuted in 2002 with “I Love The 80s.” Within… Continue reading I Can’t Stop Perceiving Myself Through The Male Gaze
The Strain
A new standard, a new life. What is there to do if not to reach for the cotton clouds feathered over the snow-covered mountains? I could tell you I’m reaching out for a way to change the world but the big picture is too much weight for my shoulders to bear. What am I really… Continue reading The Strain
No Thank You List
No thank you self-sabatoge No thank you self-victimization No thank you self-doubt No thank you mental anguish and gymnastics No thank you analysis paralysis No thank you temper tantrum tears when I don’t get my way No thank you shutting myself in and wondering why I feel lonely No thank you impossible expectations and moving… Continue reading No Thank You List
My Mind Is a Distraction Machine
Distraction. The villain. I’m in a constant state of fending it off. And sometimes - most times - I give up. I give in and let it take over my body. Even now, after I ordered myself to sit down and finish my article because I have time to write. The time is now. I may not… Continue reading My Mind Is a Distraction Machine
What Do Your Dreams Tell You?
I close my eyes and drift away to a safe place. a secure space where authenticity flowers and flourishes while Shame, insecurity, and performance are thin on the ground. I am beautiful. Natural and naked, I skip in the grass and I sore through the clouds and I soak up the sunshine. I don’t worry… Continue reading What Do Your Dreams Tell You?
Help With Rent! Victim of Sexual Assault by Sean Michael Leydig
Sean Michael Leydig was sexually assaulted in October of 2020. He decided to press charges on his perpetrator, who, at the time, was the Vice President of the Tennessee Valley Pride organization. Instead of owning up to his crime, the perpetrator proceeded to use his platform to lie and encourage violence against Sean. This led… Continue reading Help With Rent! Victim of Sexual Assault by Sean Michael Leydig
Friends Of Abuse Victims— Here’s Your Sign To Stop Hesitating and Take Action
Intimate partner violence is unfortunately a prevalent issue in our society. That being said, people and systems still are not informed to effectively treat, help or prevent the creation of victims. As a result of this societal shortcoming, recognizing the signs of abuse can be impossibly complex for a victim let alone their friends or family members. It’s… Continue reading Friends Of Abuse Victims— Here’s Your Sign To Stop Hesitating and Take Action
Just Another Day
I’m thinking of today. Of what it should or could be. Call me ungrateful, but what it is is disappointing. Women are celebrating and wishing each other a happy day. They are taking pictures creating art, sharing with us. They are advocating writing working educating spreading awareness reading the words of other brilliant women talking… Continue reading Just Another Day
8 Must-Knows For Women Under The Age of 25
Over the years, as neurologists have found more evidence about the development of the prefrontal cortex, it has been widely debated at what age the brain is considered completely mature. The latest research suggests that our brains don’t completely finish developing until we reach the golden age of twenty-five. This data has created an interesting internet debate that’s… Continue reading 8 Must-Knows For Women Under The Age of 25
Help A R*pe Victim Fight Back By Emily Mthembu
Emily Mthembu is originally from Pretoria South Africa but has been living with her grandparents in Clifton, New Jersey for most of her life. After her father died in an accident when she was an infant, she lived with her mother for 8 years. For unspecified reasons, she was unable to stay in this environment, so her grandparents took… Continue reading Help A R*pe Victim Fight Back By Emily Mthembu
Another Year Wiser, Better Years Ahead
“I seem to grow more acutely conscious of the swift passage of time as I grow older.” -Sylvia Plathe This weekend I celebrated my twenty-seventh birthday and all I could think about was the fact that it’d been two full years since I turned twenty-five. I remember sitting down in front of my birthday cake… Continue reading Another Year Wiser, Better Years Ahead
It Means Equality
Listen to women. Believe women. It doesn’t mean blindly it means a man’s words are equal to a woman’s words. It means consider her health her wellbeing as much as you consider his reputation his hard work. Consider her strength her struggle to stand her shaken speech her “I can do this ” “My voice… Continue reading It Means Equality
Wrapping Up A Year I Thought Would Never End
There’s a lot to be said about 2021. Personally, if I were to list the most difficult years I’ve ever lived through, it would easily make the Top 3 . Similar melancholy sentiments were echoed all over social media on New Years Day. My Facebook timeline alone is nothing but trauma dump after trauma dump sprinkled… Continue reading Wrapping Up A Year I Thought Would Never End
Donate To Say It Loud Space (UK)
I’m honored to announce that as of last month, I am an official blogger for Say It Loud Space (UK). My first article was published on their blog this past December. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the organization, Say It Loud is a support group for survivors of sexual violence founded in… Continue reading Donate To Say It Loud Space (UK)
Being Sued For Defamation After Sexual Assault By Soledad Maristany
This month’s story hits a little too close to home. Soledad Maristany created a GoFundMe on behalf of her friend, Nina, a musician who was assaulted in January of 2020. In October of this year, she courageously posted her truth on ‘Not In Our Scene‘, which is a safe platform for sexual assault survivors in… Continue reading Being Sued For Defamation After Sexual Assault By Soledad Maristany
Make Time To Live
We are all constantly thinking about time and how to use it, or how to get the most from it. We measure time in productivity which is incorrect but it’s too late to change that for the world. We can possibly change it for ourselves. I was recently asked what I think the best use… Continue reading Make Time To Live
The Performer
If there’s one thing I know about people it’s that many of them will go to the most melodramatic lengths to fabricate authenticity. Nobody is without insecurity, and there is a bit of a performer in all of us. But there are many that have a permanent spotlight hovering over them like a halo. These… Continue reading The Performer
November Update: An Adventurous Anniversary
On the morning of our anniversary, Eric and I were awoken by the blood-curdling squeal of a poor little mouse. Why was he squealing? Because our maintenance man placed glue traps in our home which are the most horrific contraptions I’ve ever heard of. Seriously I can’t believe these things are legal!! I started to… Continue reading November Update: An Adventurous Anniversary
Five Songs From ‘Red’ That Deeply Influenced My Womanhood
After months of waiting, Taylor’s Version of her album Red has finally been released. Taylor Swift’s fourth studio album originally debuted in October 2012, but this year she has begun re-releasing her previous works in order to rightfully gain back ownership of her masters. After thoroughly enjoying the release of Fearless(Taylor’s Version) in May of… Continue reading Five Songs From ‘Red’ That Deeply Influenced My Womanhood
A Survivor’s Thoughts On Reporting An Assault By Ariel
“Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.” Paul Holes Paul Holes used this phrase in his podcast today stating this is commonly said between crime investigators. Like I’ve said time and time again, especially in cases of sexual assault, it tends to come down to a he-said-she-said, which in turn leaves many cases unreported.… Continue reading A Survivor’s Thoughts On Reporting An Assault By Ariel
Despite, Not Because
They tell me I’m strong. It’s true. How familiar, the sound of misunderstanding behind the word “strong” coupled with good intentions. I say nothing or “thank you.” It’s widely believed that trauma makes victims more resilient. Trauma doesn’t make victims more anything. Trauma takes. Trauma is a monster that aims to annihilate anything in its… Continue reading Despite, Not Because
If I Had A Daughter
I’d be tempted to keep her from society. Not for myself, but to protect her soul. To shield her from the poison that exists in the sharp teeth of the monsters who slither around and feast on angelic beings. Imagine if there was a way to assure that she would remain unscathed, unviolated, unscarred, unburdened … Continue reading If I Had A Daughter
Another Moment
You’re playing piano in an empty coffee shop. I’m sipping on the perfect cup And consuming confectionery bliss With a sparkle of citrus But It’s difficult to chew when The muscles in my mouth Are fixed in the proudest grin. Beaming. You are my piano man. Those magnificent fingers I hold in my hand daily… Continue reading Another Moment
Roxane Gay Could Have Read My Essay
The greatly anticipated results of the Medium Writers Challenge were finally announced last week, and they seemed to stir quite a bit of controversy. The drama of it all has been relatively entertaining. Unfortunately, I was not the finalist nor one of the honorable mentions. Although I didn’t expect to win, I couldn’t help the… Continue reading Roxane Gay Could Have Read My Essay
Re-Writing My Future: Thoughts From A Recently Diagnosed Musician By Amanda Roswick
Initially, I responded to my EDS and Pots Diagnoses with relief. Many blood tests had come back normal, so I felt validated when something was actually wrong. Today, though, I hit a huge wall of realization that, although it doesn’t mean my life will be cut short, it will impact my quality of life and… Continue reading Re-Writing My Future: Thoughts From A Recently Diagnosed Musician By Amanda Roswick
More About Me: My Writing Journey
TW: Sexual violence Those of you who have been following my blog since it began are most likely familiar with my story. If you haven’t already, you can read more about my creation of this blog here. This week, I was given the opportunity to publish another bio onto a publication on Medium. At first,… Continue reading More About Me: My Writing Journey
Safe Space for Kenyana R
TW: sexual assault, suicide Over the past several years, Kenyana R has been working to recover from the trauma she endured while she was in an abusive relationship. She initially moved to New York City to escape from said relationship. However, since moving there, she has suffered more unrelenting trauma and abuse. In August of… Continue reading Safe Space for Kenyana R
Becoming Unemployable: What My Resume Would Say If It Were Honest
If there’s one thing I’m sure of in this world, it is that I can form an immediate connection to any person who’s ever worked in customer service or retail. When people like us happen to cross paths and engage in conversation, we are overcome with a warm, almost nurturing sensation from the acceptance to… Continue reading Becoming Unemployable: What My Resume Would Say If It Were Honest
I don’t have a therapist. Here is a poem.
Everyone says therapy is necessary after trauma. I agree but it’s not as simple as it sounds. Therapy is not gossiping with your friends or venting to your family. It can feel that way eventually. But therapy is work. Therapy is a mirror. Therapy is difficult often. I run from things that are difficult and… Continue reading I don’t have a therapist. Here is a poem.
Fundraiser By Sabrina Solomon
In June of this year, Sabrina Solomon of Rockdale, TX created a fundraiser for a survivor she knows personally who prefers to remain anonymous. This victim has been consistently stalked and harassed by a perpetrator who lives in her apartment complex. This harassment has been going on since May. Initially, the perpetrator broke in through… Continue reading Fundraiser By Sabrina Solomon
August Update: Finding Peace Amidst the Chaos
Hello! It’s true, last month was hectic. I didn’t realize so much of it (and more) would carry over into the next month! A lot of quick changes have occurred since I last updated the page. Changes both stressful, and ultimately exciting! I’m more of a big picture person so, the way I see it,… Continue reading August Update: Finding Peace Amidst the Chaos
Searching in Familiar Places
There is a tickle between my toes with every searing step I take along the exfoliant sand as I’m drawn toward the shore. Could that be her slim silhouette in the distance? The sand turns compact and cool. I leave an imprint that pools with brisk… Continue reading Searching in Familiar Places
Fundraiser by Sequioa Huff
TW: Rape, Stalking Sequioa Huff, 19, of Atlanta, GA was raped on May 13th of this year. Fortunately, she was able to go the hospital to get a forensic exam directly after the attack. She then reported the crime to the… Continue reading Fundraiser by Sequioa Huff
July Update: Buy Me A Coffee!
Hello, friends! Recently, things have been quieter around here in terms of consistent posts, so I wanted to take the opportunity to address it. The months of June and July have been quite turbulent and unpredictable for me and many of the people… Continue reading July Update: Buy Me A Coffee!
Eternal Gratitude: Dad
For most of my childhood, my Mom would stay home with my sisters and me. There were a few years where she also worked, and we got to spend time with our Dad in the evenings. One of my favorite…
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Stick To Your List; Know Your Red Flags
After abuse, self-advocacy is one of the most important yet challenging skills to master. Leaving an abusive relationship can feel nearly impossible. It requires a person to recognize that their boundaries are being broken while their nervous system is responding to trauma. There is usually…
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Remember, Not Everyone Can Reveal Their Pride
TW: LGBTQIA+ Suicide, Homophobia June is my favorite month of the summer season because almost every day, my social media feed is filled with a colorful collage of pictures and inspirational sentiments from the many out and proud members of the LGBTQIA+ community. While it…
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Fundraiser for Brooklyn Summers
TW: Transphobia, Sexual assault, PTSD Brooklyn Summers is a black transgender woman and survivor of sexual assault from North Hollywood, Florida. After being diagnosed with PTSD, she was admitted to a mental hospital due to continuous intense nightmares about the…
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Day Dream Carried Away
A fresh page in a new journal, I want to fill in the blanks with the thoughts you inspire. A best friend, A romance, A release. I’ll look at you and feel sunshine golden warmth and hellfire red sins. You ask for my words…
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Fall in Love with Yourself: A Letter to Me at 22
Dear 22-year-old Alex, I know you don’t think so, but there are so many reasons to love you that have nothing to do with your mile-long legs or the sparkle of your eager eyes. Your endless enthusiasm combined with your head-turning audacity are what make you…
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Justice for Lily
TW: Sexual assault, severe trauma, pedophilia This month as I searched for a survivor’s fundraiser to feature here, I found a story that is as heinous as it is infuriating, which is why I find it incredibly important to talk about. The…
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Eternal Gratitude-Mom
When my sisters and I were younger, every year on Mother’s Day we used to wake up early so we could draw pictures with crayons on construction paper for my mom. Our Dad would help us to make eggs benny and… Continue reading Eternal Gratitude-Mom
Performative Activism is Everywhere
It is important for us to recognize that April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. But, in 2021, is “awareness” really something we need more of? The awareness we needed came after the early to mid 2010s when women’s empowerment started trending in pop culture and slowly grew. We saw female… Continue reading Performative Activism is Everywhere
Dear Loyalist by Amanda Roswick
You believe him. Why wouldn’t you – when he serves you the whole world on a silver platter? But be warned – Your euphoria is an illusion It will soon be your head he serves on that silver platter And when that happens, Those that once bore the weight of…
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Meaningless Words
People speak words to me as if the words alone mean something, As if I should put trust in the words themselves. Words are meaningless without action and Intentions are pointless without follow through. Rich, coming from a woman who struggles to commit to anything. Even richer, because I say…
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A Survivor’s Thoughts on Pursuing Justice
TW: Rape, sexual violence, abuse, sexism I know the right thing to do is to pursue justice. But all my life, what I’ve known to be true is that moving on requires a lot of space, time and personal growth. Pursuing justice will stunt this. Pursuing justice will take up…
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Learning To (LWord) After Abuse
Ok, so am I a part of a couple now? Can this happen for me? Is this allowed? My history of dating and relationships has been tumultuous, to say the least. After so many abusive experiences, I had gotten into the habit of only being attracted to the wrong type…
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Eternal Gratitude-Abby
As this blog has barely begun, I’d like to start it off with a few staple components that will keep me consistent in my posting. One thing that I loved to do when I was younger was write letters and cards of appreciation to people that made my life better.…
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Justice for Tayvion
If you’ve read my story on my About Me page, you’re already aware that one of the main reasons I started this blog was to spread awareness about victims of sexual violence and trauma. My aim is to use this space to amplify the voices of those who are unheard. I…
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My Body Is Badass!
The female form has been exploited, sexualized, criticized and idealized for centuries. I don’t generally like to discuss mine, or anyone else’s, because I believe we are ALL much more than just our figures. Too much of my life I’ve spent obsessing over my image. It’s been exhausting. I wish…
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I Wish
I wish women would stick together all the time.I wish it were that simple.It’s not.They don’t.Often times they have valid reasons not to.It doesn’t mean it won’t sting me.I understand.People…
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Identifying a Gaslighter
Gaslighting is the act of manipulation using psychological efforts to make a person question their own sanity and reality. The behavior ranges from toxic communication to severe emotional abuse, depending on how frequent it is. It is a tactic used by abusers, control freaks AND ordinary people. Understandably, most don’t…
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Eternal Metamorphosis 